anxiety · life · lifestyle · parenting · twenties

Twenties – All Groan Up…

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This couldn’t be more true…

Your twenties will produce more failures than you will choose to remember.

Life will never feel like it is supposed to, being twentysomething brings more pressure than being a teenager as you are now a young adult.
You could be travelling, at University, in a dead job, married with children, or on your own with children. But let me tell you it doesn’t matter where you are in your life, at this moment you are exactly where you need to be and in a few years time you see that.
But what ever you are doing enjoy it.

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Do not compete with anyone, be original and do things your own way and learn from your mistakes.
Do not compare yourself with anyone doing things different to you. If you suffer with Anxiety like me it will only make it worse.

And a tip from me, do not ever, EVER check your Facebook when you are:
Depressed
Drinking
Unemployed.

Many people use Facebook these days to brag, gossip and many will thrive off your misery.

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I have under two and a half years left of my twenties and what an adventure it has been with so many ups and downs.
I had my son at 21, and I really did think I was supposed to have my life together. I moved out of my parents at 19 and felt I didn’t have my my youth anymore.

At 22 I became a single Mother, not easy. I was a mess. I had decided to part with my child’s father as I felt trapped, controlled and everyday was the same. I was turning into a ‘housewife’! I had goals and dreams too ya know.
It took me 5 years to reconnect with his father and now we are all enjoying life as a happy family.

I decided to go back to college and study animal care to pursue my dream working with animals, make something of myself, and I wanted the best for my son.
I took my son with me and he spent time in the Nursery on campus whilst I studied, it was a great achievement because I proved so many people wrong.
Although I never got round to working in the animal industry, I do some charity work with animals when I can which is very rewarding.

After college I needed to work, I was slowly getting myself into more debt. I was still young I had gone from a serious relationship to living alone in a flat with my toddler and managing bills and expenses alone. I wanted my luxuries still, a new outfit for me and a new toy for my boy. After a few cleaning jobs here and there I then fell into the care industry.
That is when my money spiraled out of control, I was on a zero hour contract so they chose what hours to give me and sometimes I wouldn’t have any. I was paying a fair bit of money for my son to attend nursery too.
So I made a decision to become a stay at home mother living off benefits, a decision I didn’t want to make because 1. I enjoyed working and 2. the stigma of being a single mum on benefits.

When my son turned 3, he went to nursery and I volunteered for the local RSPCA, I was preparing to get back into full time work and did not want my CV to have nothing on there.

When my son started full time school I was desperately seeking work, I needed an income and a career of my own. I did a weeks admin course to boost my CV and applied for many, many jobs.
But I was undesirable as a single mother.
Finding work was upsetting my anxiety and turning it into depression, I was convincing myself I wasn’t good enough, it took my 8 months to find the job I have now, and in my interview I had stated I was a single parent and to my surprise the manager had replied saying “I am very sympathetic to single mothers” and I was offered the job.

I could go into great detail about how difficult my early twenties were  but that is in the past now. I have learnt from my mistakes and my mistakes have got me where I am today with my son keeping me motivated.

And after all the fuss and hard times I only have under two and a half years left of my twenties and for the last year or so I have done that.
I have put myself first at times and that is why I started my Bucket List (previous posts)

So don’t lose your twenties, enjoy them.

Listen to this….

 

Jo

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