Oh my, it is Monday already.
The weekend sure did fly by.
I did not get a good nights sleep on either nights so I am drinking coffee like there is no tomorrow, I am sure I will be buzzing by the end of the day.
I had a pretty good weekend.
Friday night I enjoyed a cosy night in with my family, my son and I counted his pocket money and he had a surprising £70.00. He is such a good little saver, so on Saturday he treated himself to new Pokemon games and DVDs.
Saturday evening I went to my friends 30th birthday party. It was 80’s theme and I wore a wig which was a mix between George Micheal and Madonna. It was a good evening and I had a good chat with a friend about Anxiety, he did not know I had Anxiety and I did not know he was a sufferer too. Its refreshing to know again I am not the only one.
And Sunday I had cuddles with my dear friends new born baby boy Zachary, a tiny 6lbs 1oz and absolutely gorgeous.
However this weekend my mind has gone on overtime!
Intrusive bloody thoughts. Out of the blue, random thoughts that pop into my head at anytime and any place and feed my anxiety. I immediately allow these thoughts to have importance and wish I could have the power to let them go.
I begin my rituals, my checks, and I find myself seeking reassurance from people and of course google search engine.
Its always what if, what if, WHAT IF?!
I am worrying about things that do not exist, and they are always negative. Why can’t they be a bundle of positives instead?
Are these thoughts logical, are they really going to happen?
The more attention I give them the more they take over.
I am trying meditation but struggling to switch off, I need to persevere but it is proving to be difficult.
If any one has any meditation tips please let me know.