anxiety · blog · life · Mental Health · panic attacks

False Fight

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I am not having the best day, I am still at work feeling defeated.
I just want to go home and hibernate.

For so many years I thought I was fighting my anxiety but only this year the horrible realisation is that I have been doing the opposite, I have been feeding it.

anxietygirl
I was aware of some safety behaviours but not in depth. After researching I am aware that most day to day things I do is in fact a safety behaviour.

I have done this for years, is there a way out for me?
I always thought I would beat this by fighting and acknowledging what it is.
But the reality is I have multiple fears that are clearly not defined.

I know I need to talk to someone, someone professional.

It’s so easy to share things with strangers behind a keyboard and those who relate to what you’re saying with no judgement.
I’m not having to face anyone.

Some days I’m having a good day and seeing clearly, I read through blogs and support and advise other anxiety sufferers. I should be taking my own advice sometimes.

I dislike talking to family and friends around my anxiety. I feel ashamed and a burden.
I don’t want to worry about what they think.
It’s so easy to let everything out on here.

So thank you for letting me and for reading.

Jo

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2 thoughts on “False Fight

  1. I can totally relate. Talking to my family about EVERYTHING I need to get off my chest with my mental illness has always made me feel like a burden. And to be honest I haven’t shared with many friends. It is hard to talk to people that have not experienced a mental illness or that aren’t very educated on it. I have been seeing a therapist for a few months now and it helps tremendously. You can lay everything out on the table and have no judgements made. They also help give you that reality check when you need it! Although talking to people in this blogging community is extremely helpful, I would recommend giving it a shot. I hope your day gets better!! 🙂

    Like

    1. You’re right, those who have not experienced a mental illness or know much about it just don’t get it and if I were to speak to them I’d worry they’d think I was dramatic or something. I think I am definitely ready for therapy, I’m glad you have found it helpful. I’ve put it off for so long, too long. Thank you, my day did get better finally 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

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