Today I am having a bad anxiety day.
I walk around with this evil presence everyday, my uncontrollable anxiety that clings to me all day, everyday.
I am getting myself worked up because its muggy and warm today, well in my office it is. So it is making me feel hot and slightly dizzy and because of this I am convincing myself I am coming down with some sort of bug.
I am concentrating on the sensation so much that I am now starting to feel sick.
From the outside I appear relatively ‘normal’ colleagues coming in and out of my office and don’t notice that inside I am fighting a battle. t feels like a losing battle.
I have not had a full on panic attack yet, it is like the anxiety is just niggling at me and sucking the life out of me.
I am going round in circles, waiting for this ordeal to be over. I have tried steady breathing, concentrating on my work and distracting myself but it is not going away today.
I have tried so much. Medication, research, books! Why is it never going away?
I am so fed up, I do have my good days and then my anxiety strikes, for no good reason I cannot see what has triggered this today!
My heart rate it up, I am dizzy and I feel disorientated.
I am losing all sense and feel horribly sick, mentally I feel I am losing my mind.
I feel like going home but I can’t let the anxiety win.